It's not that I think stupidity should be punishable by death. I just think we should take the warning labels off of everything and let the problem take care of itself.

About me: 38 (ish), gay, libertarian.
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Stone Four
Need some writing
or photography done?
Slap! - Juliano Lopes
Today's Slap comes courtesy of Jim, who wrote a while back and suggested Brazilian hottie Juliano Lopes. And Jim was kind enough to send along a nice batch of Juliano's photos with his suggestion.

Anyway, Juliano has definitely been making the rounds this year it seems, and deservedly so. He's got that nice combination of fur and the perfect body. Wow.

More Juliano Lopes

He is hot. Would like to see what he's holding. Beautiful teddy bear. Great pic. I could lay with all day and night and not get tired.
anonymous | 2011-05-09 21:51

That may be the best slap ever!
Sam | 2011-05-09 21:51

three more words: HOLY FUCKING SHIT! W-O-W!
Craig | 2011-05-09 21:51

Those eyes, that chest and stomach! WOW... those Brazilians really know how to make'em!
dae | 2011-05-09 21:51

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Slap! - Greg Plitt
Chris wrote a while back to suggest that I include fitness model Greg Plitt. Greg is definitely a hottie, and since he's a fitness model you can guarantee lots of skin!

His site has quite a nice selection.

More Greg Plitt

Love the slaps, but we need to see more hairy men!
mark | 2011-05-09 21:51

Enough constan hairy-whining already. Hair is out right now get used to it. It will be back all too soon.
Chris | 2011-05-09 21:51

Yes, I agree! Gregg has obviously taken good care of himself, but it would be great to see hairier men. Not necessarily bears...just a goodlooking guy with a nicely patterned hairy chest and nicely muscular hairy legs. The shaved look with muscles and ripped abs are far from being uncommon from every fitness magazine you see and have become somewhat ordinary.....not that I'd kick them out of bed.
Scout | 2011-05-09 21:51

Ordinary? Then I pray to god that I could be ordinary.
anonymous | 2011-05-09 21:51

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Slap! - Matthew Goode
Chris wrote some time back to suggest today's victim, actor Matthew Goode. And thanks to xyzpdq over at Dreamcaps, we have some great pics of this lovely fellow, including his lovely ass. And (do I really need to say nudity warning on this site?) his cock. Just a little.

Unfortunately, I don't have time to say any more because I'm off to pick up my husband at the airport!! Ciao!

More Matthew Goode

with the dark hair.. very hot! one post I may have missed.. did you ever say anything about Taylor winning Idol?
tom | 2011-05-09 21:51

I had a dream to begin my company, nevertheless I didn't have enough of money to do this. Thank goodness my close colleague proposed to take the Thus I used the short term loan and made real my dream.
MonroeJessica35 | 2011-05-09 21:51

He has a wonderfully deep voice as well.
Jenna's Bush | 2011-05-09 21:51

Slap! - Brian Austin Green
Well, I think we're done with X-Slaps. I was going to Slap Aaron Stanford, but I couldn't find a single picture that even made him look cute. Does anyone out there have any? I'll admit I wasn't able to search very thoroughly, but I thought I might turn up one.

So anyway, we're moving on to other things today - one of Joey's long list of recommendations was erstwhile 90210 star, Brian Austin Green. Brian was always one of my favorites on the show - partially, I think, because he was the only one of the stars that was actually in high school during the run of the show.

And Brian has been turning up lately in Freddie with former Slap Freddie Prinze Jr.. And of course, he's making gobs of guest appearances on everything from CSI to The Twilight Zone.

More Brian Austin Green

Me thinks people are plugging their own blogs with promises of what's not there.
hat12 | 2011-05-09 21:51

try google search: brian austin green groped
anonymous | 2011-05-09 21:51

How did the cross tatoo switch arms?
Brandon | 2011-05-09 21:51

The last picture is reversed, that's how it switched arms.
Ryan | 2011-05-09 21:51

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Advance apology
I want to apologize in advance for the slow e-mail response you'll get from me this week. Not that it's ever very prompt, but it's going to be extra slow this week because I'm at the beach.

I'm going to keep the Slaps going, including, I hope, some of the college hotties from the house up the street...

Slap! - Shawn Ashmore
Sorry for the missed Slap yesterday, but I had a wicked couple of days and I just couldn't get my act together sufficiently to get a Slap out the door. Nevertheless, I got a bunch of nominations for other X-Slaps, including former Slap Daniel Cudmore and today's victim, Shawn Ashmore. Shawn plays "Iceman" starting today in X-Men: The Last Stand. He's been in any number of other films & on TV, but I don't remember him from anything but X. Anyone else? Anything worth checking out?

More Shawn Ashmore

It might be worth checking him out as a porn star in "3 Needles".
anonymous | 2011-05-09 21:51

I think Shawn is cuter than his twin.

Eric W | 2011-05-09 21:51

His twin brother Aaron was in the "Prom Queen". Shawn was in another Canadian production titled "Terry Fox" where he play, eh, Terry Fox.

Check this out:
KK | 2011-05-09 21:51

He was in that movie Prom Queen about the true life story of that Canadian kid that wanted to bring his boyfriend to his Catholic High School prom.
anonymous | 2011-05-09 21:51

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Slap! - James Marsden
Rounding out the primo crap of X-Hotties, today's Slap is Cyclops, James Marsden. James has been featured here before, but thanks to some lovely people over at Dreamcaps I found some very nice new pictures. And James really is just amazing.

Are there any other X-Hotties that I need to pay attention to? Aaron Stanford looks like a good choice - he's been Slapped before - but I can't seem to find any new good pictures. I guess that's never stopped me before. And Shawn Ashmore is looking good too... Hmmm. I guess I have some work to do.

More James Marsden

Update: Someone asked where the boxing pic came from - it was actually an episode of Ally McBeal in which he starred with an almost equally pretty Josh Hopkins.

One of the last pictures shows a nice patch of fur on his chest. He needs to quit that shaving!
Jimmy | 2011-05-09 21:51

Stupid schmoopid! This guy has GOT to be one of the hottest men in hollywood. Unfortunately, his type is illegal here in Chicago!! Slap o' the month, w/o doubt. ANd yeah...I saw an interview with the guy and he's about as sharp as a bag of wet mice. ;-)
Jamie | 2011-05-09 21:51

Don't get me wrong - he's hot and everything - but isn't he the guy that bashed the gay population once? Maybe I'm mistaken.
anonymous | 2011-05-09 21:51

I have been trying to find those boxing pics forever. Thank you!!
Matt | 2011-05-09 21:51

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Slap! - Hugh Jackman
Today's Slap takes us back to the world of the X-Hotties. Hugh Jackman has been here before, but movie or not he deserves another go. He's not my favorite X-Dude (that's Cyclops), but he's pretty damn fine nonetheless. And the best news of all is that we get to see Hugh and recent Slap Ben Foster and Cyclops on Friday.

More Hugh Jackman

Tied spreadeagle pic is not of Jackman. It's from a Drummer magazine publication from about 25 years ago.

That being said, tied spreadeagle pic of Jackman would be fun to see :-)
anonymous | 2011-05-09 21:51

Brenton: You should be ashamed of yourself: Living in Oz, seeing Hugh working out, having Mike for a BF! You're too damned lucky in life.
JT, formerly bottomguy | 2011-05-09 21:51

Don't you acknowledge that this is the best time to get the mortgage loans, which would make your dreams come true.
CrosbyPatricia23 | 2011-05-09 21:51

He just needs to drop trousers and show us his hard ass.....or whatever else he wants to show. A very hot man!!
Paul B. | 2011-05-09 21:51

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Slap! - Dennis Quaid
Augusto wrote to request that I Slap actor Dennis Quaid; since my husband had recently suggested the same thing, I figured he was a good choice. I remember Dennis from one of his earliest roles, in 1979's Breaking Away. He has, of course, gone on to lots of much bigger things, but he's always looked good doing them.

More Dennis Quaid

Wow..he just gets better with age. I MUCH prefer his more recent pictures to his babyfaced pics. Love that "Daddy" look he has developed.
Doug | 2011-05-09 21:51

He has the most amazing abs in 'Breaking Away'.
anonymous | 2011-05-09 21:51

Ew! He looks old!
deborah | 2011-05-09 21:51

Anyone know where to come up with an 80's photo of Dennis shirtless and wearing a neck tie? I think it was in People or US or something like that. HOT!
anonymous | 2011-05-09 21:51

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Day 4 - 22-Apr - Florence to Radda
Day 4 started in Florence. Our appointment at at Accademia dell'Arte del Disegno was early, so we set our alarm. We headed our from our hotel - a bit late, as it turns out - and made our way to the museum.

I guess I expected something like The Musee du Louvre, because the museum itself was a disappointment. We also had to work around an irritating Spanish tour group in the museum. Nevertheless, I was amazed by Michelangelo's David. It really is an incredible piece of work.

After David, we grabbed some breakfast and then returned to the hotel to pack up. TJ stayed behind, while Patrick, Hank & I headed across the river to a very cool monastery overlooking the city. At the monastery, there was a cemetery was like none I've ever seen. TJ's task was to rent a car, get it loaded and come pick us up.

He managed to get the car loaded with our 800 lbs. of luggage and get to the monastery with no trouble at all. The rest of us piled into the car and headed for the wine. We had no specific destination in mind, so we pulled out a tour book and opted for Greve in Chianti, reportedly the "heart" of Chianti. We stopped along the way for lunch at a great restaurant overlooking some vineyards - unfortunately, I can't remember the name - and got the very friendly staff to help us make reservations at our hotel in Radda.

We were looking, in Greve, for information about the various vineyards, but the information office was closed. We did, however, find a great wine store with wines from throughout the region. We thought we might buy a case of various wines to send home, but the cost of shipping was incredible (190 Euros or $240) for 12 bottles! So that plan was out. But they had a cool wine sampling system - you purchased a pre-paid card and could use it at any of 150 or so tasting stations to get a small taste of wine. As you can imagine, we bought a card or two. We found a couple of wines we liked and bought them to enjoy later at the hotel.

While we were driving, we found another hotel in the guide book that we thought we might like - La Locanda. It wasn't easy to find, but we ran across it a few miles down a dirt road outside of Volpaia (a really cute town, by the way). The setting of the hotel was amazing: Perched alone on a hillside, the views were incredible. The hotel was charming and quiet. It seemed nearly perfect. Unfortunately, we were there early in the season, and they had just opened the rooms. Something they had used to clean the rooms made them smell terribly of mothballs - so we had to move on. But not before swiping a couple of pieces of chocolate...

We figured that our best bet was to head on to the hotel where we'd made the reservation - in Radda in Chianti. Our hotel was the charming Relais Vignale. The whole setting was absolutely lovely - perched at the top of a hill, right on the edge of Radda, the views from our rooms and the hotel pool were stunning. And TJ made up for the crappy hotel in Florence by giving Patrick & me the room with the balcony.

And Radda could not have been any better. It's a great small town with a nice quiet piazza where we managed to score some free appetizers with our wine at the Caffe San Niccolo. The waitress was a hoot and we had fun helping her learn English. The funniest part was when she made a crack about Bush and the war in Iraq; we laughed, but her boss yelled at her not to have political discussions with Americans. Dinner was at La Perla del Palazzo near a couple of obnoxious guys from Boston. Geesh, what a hassle they were! But the food was good and the restaurant was otherwise quite enjoyable.

More Day 4

Ironic. My coworker and I were checking our names as a web address and when I checked another coworker's name as a web address I got your site.
Then I noticed you recently took a trip to Italy and actually stayed in Greve in Chianti. I just came back from Italy two weeks ago and stayed in Greve in Chianti for two days (May 18th & 19th).
We also got lost one night coming home from Florence and drove all around the Chianti region. We drove through Radda in Chianti and other places and you are correct the views were just absolutely spectacular! Indescribable. congratulations on your trip, I know you enjoyed it.
Corrie | 2011-05-09 21:51

Slap! - This Guy David Guillo
OK, this is gonna sound weird, but I don't know who today's Slap is. Tommy wrote recently, looking for information on a hottie he'd seen around, and unfortunately, I wasn't able to help him. But I figured that some of my incredible readers might know something about him, so I thought I'd combine the request and a Slap into one post. Is that good, or am I just lazy? You be the judge.

So anyway, here he is:

Any ideas as to who he is? BTW, the picture came from here.

Update: Since Stuart was kind enough to fill us in on his identity, I thought I'd share more pictures of Spanish model David Guillo. As I searched around for pics, I noticed that he won the model of the month award. I'd say he's got a good chance at being Slap of the Month too. What an honor!!

So anyway, you can see more pics of David here.

This David Guillo, a Spanish model.
Stuart | 2011-05-09 21:51

This IS David Guillo, a Spanish model.
Stuart | 2011-05-09 21:51

Stupid L'Oreal and their stupid advertising. I wouldn't buy anything from a company that advertises to me with a slogan like: "You think you look the business. She thinks you look overworked". Yeah, she, we all have to like women. And I really often think "I look the business", that's exactly what I think.
hat12 | 2011-05-09 21:51

It is cool that people are able to receive the credit loans and it opens completely new possibilities.
ColleenWADE33 | 2011-05-09 21:51

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We saw The DaVinci Code last night and I have to say I was somewhat disappointed. I thought the movie stayed very true to the book, but there was just something missing to me and also to my husband. He thought the main problem was Tom Hanks - he just couldn't believe the idea that Tom Hanks was an intellectual.

Personally, I thought it was more about the script and the directing; the pacing was, at times, glacial. If you've read the book, you know that you virtually get dragged along on an incredible roller coaster ride of suspense. The movie didn't do that for me - perhaps becuase I had read the book. Oh, and I remember reading that in Cannes, some in the audience laughed out loud right at the film's climax. We did too.

The reviews seem to be largely negative, but box office receipts appear to be fairly good. I was one of those who read the bad reviews and was intent on seeing the film anyway, but if I had it to do over again, I'd wait for the DVD.

The one saving grace was that Paul Bettany looked good - if really creepy.

Ron Howard directs the movie - not really expect much from him. His works tends to be more on the commercial side - typical Hollywood style.
KK | 2011-05-09 21:51

The movie certainly lacked the pacing of the book, I suppose that is to be expected in translating the complexity of a book into a movie. Serious problems include the lack of pink eyes in Silas (he had pigmented eyes, so he couldn't be albino in the movie), the change of the pentagram from abdomen to chest (couldn't show an old man's penis), the changes to the conclusion (esp. Silas, the exemption of Sophie's brother, Sauniere's relat. to Sophie). Still, Paul Bettany naked: what an ass.
cupre | 2011-05-09 21:51

Okay - I liked it, but the book was definitely better, as always. I agree that Tom Hanks is just not intellectual and does not fit the part. The book was more suspenseful, and the things that they omitted and changed irked me. But yes, Paul Bettany... yum.
anonymous | 2011-05-09 21:51

"an incredible roller coaster ride of suspense"? Wow. I thought the book was badly written, with awful characterization and predictable plot. I'm still curious to see the film though.
hat12 | 2011-05-09 21:51

Slap! - Ben Foster
Alex wrote to suggest that I take a few days and focus on several of the hotties of the forthcoming X-Men: The Last Stand, starting, at his suggestion, with Ben Foster, who plays Angel. I've seen some of the previews and have to say that I'm looking forward to seeing how Angel develops in the movie. Ben's other recent project of note, of course, is Alpha Dog.

More Ben Foster

Touched by an angel!!!
Ron | 2011-05-09 21:51

Very cute twink
Mike | 2011-05-09 21:51

Very nice. This kid's grown up a lot since I first saw him in "Get Over It." Thanks for the post :)
Alex | 2011-05-09 21:51

Was also in the Punisher, and Hostage. Usually seen with long lanky hair, and being very very weird!

The bod is outstanding!
Kim | 2011-05-09 21:51

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This should help with Social Security's troubles
Taking the most obvious step possible both to fix Social Security and control the problem of illegal immigration, the Senate voted yesterday to allow illegal aliens to collect Social Security benefits on past illegal employment.

The crap that goes on in Washington is usually irritating, but unfortunately all too rarely surprising. Politicians are, at heart, whores after all.

I just read the artical... What in the hell is wrong with them in Washington?
They all need to be Slapped upside the head!
Bleu | 2011-05-09 21:51

Of course, those benefits will be paid out to people who paid *into* the system... It's not like they're "stealing" benefits without having paid payroll taxes. If they paid payroll taxes on their past employment, why not let them draw benefits? Otherwise, who's stealing? I have a friend who is a citizen of the United States who has worked in Germany for years (yes, legally), and having paid into their social welfare system qualifies for German benefits for the rest of her life now, too.
ubu | 2011-05-09 21:51

"What in the hell is wrong with them in Washington?"

That's easy: They're Republicans.
Jenna's Bush | 2011-05-09 21:51

And while we're at it...
OK - two polls in two days. I know I'm asking too much... But I thought this one was important.

I Slapped the two hot stars of Supercross in the last two days: Mike Vogel and Steve Howey. So, who's hotter?

I guess this is sort of "Slap of Supercross".

Who's hotter? Steve or Mike?

Mike Vogel - I love the twink scruff
Steve Howey - He's got such a great body

didn't spoil American Idol this time at least.
hat12 | 2011-05-09 21:51

What a tough choice -- they are both delicious and they are both deserving of my undying devotion (among other things) -- guess I have to go with Steve -- loved the big lug on Reba
anonymous | 2011-05-09 21:51

Slap! - Steve Howey
Following up on yesterday's Slap of Mike Vogel - and taking an excellent suggestion from Joey's long list - we're sticking with the Supercross theme for one more day and Slapping Steve Howey. Steve was better known to me for his role as the idiot Van Montgomery in Reba, but since he hardly ever shows any skin on Reba, I had high hopes for Supercross. There wasn't enough skin (is there ever?), but it was a moderately enjoyable stupid film.

More Steve Howey

yes indeed! He's the only reason I switch back-n-forth beyween Reba and whatever else i'm watching. Love the 1st photo - sometimes B/W captures better.
gad1n10 | 2011-05-09 21:51

Day 3 - 21-Apr - Venice/Florence
Sorry for the delay, but here are more pics of the trip to Italy. We started the day in Venice with an absolutely fantastic canal-side breakfast at our hotel. We did a little shopping, including buying some jeans at Sisley and wandered around a bit. We made our way down to the Academy Bridge and across the Grand Cancel - stopping, of course, for gelato. We got some lunch at Ristorante da Raffaele (did I mention that I really love the tagliatelle Bolognese?) and headed back to pack and head for the train station.

We got the departure from our hotel right, in contrast to our arrival - they moved our suitcases for us and we were able to wait in the lobby and surf while we waited for our cab. The cab took us up and around the Grand Canal to the train station.

We had booked window seats on the Eurostar to Florence and we wanted to get our bags on and get settled. The great disappointment was boarding only to discover that the glass next to our seats had been shattered by something, and instead of replacing the glass, they simply put a large piece of adhesive plastic over it. So instead of a view of the Italian countryside for 3 hours, we were to have a view of a cracked window and nasty looking plastic. The one stroke of luck was that the seats across the aisle were never claimed, so we did manage to have window seats for the entire trip.

Upon arrival in Florence, we grabbed a cab, drove around the corner (almost literally) and were deposited at our rather disappointing hotel. Strictly speaking a 3-star hotel, the Hotel Dele Telle is not the place to stay in Florence. Perhaps I'm being overly critical, but when you see the picture of the bathroom (after the jump) you might agree. Just in case you can't make it out, the bathroom is small enough that you can actually take a shower while you sit on the toilet and brush your teeth at the sink. Fortunately, it was only one night. Whew!

We met our friends at the hotel and headed out to look around a bit and grab some dinner. We consulted the guide book for some suggestions, but were unable to track down our pick, so we finally opted for the restaurant across the street at the time of our greatest frustration. We lucked into a really great place, Simon Boccanegra. The food was some of the best of the trip, actually.

Still not fully adjusted to our new time zone, we headed back to the hotel and promptly crashed, anticipating our reservations to see Michelangelo's David in the morning.

More of day 3

Time for a poll!
We haven't had a poll on here in ages, so I thought I'd run a totally scientific and thoroughly unbiased poll on American Idol. Who do you think is going to win? Kat with her stunning voice? Or Taylor with his clever impersonation of a pinball? See? Completely unbiased.

Maybe I should ask who should win? Nah.

Who's going to win American Idol?

Kat - Her voice is just so amazing!
Taylor - I like his imitation of a Mexican jumping bean

Clearly American Idol is not about the most talented or even the best singer, it's about people voting more than once, hitting redial for whom they'd most like to see win. Ask yourself, would you buy their album? Will we know who they are in a decade? I think not. Despite what Clive Davis says, they have yet to surpass Elvis, Marilyn, James Dean, Madonna, Whitney Houston, Barbra Steisand, Ella Fitzgerald, Sarah Vaughn, Billie Holiday, Frank Sinatra, Bette Midler, Barry Manilow, Elton John etc. as an (American) Idol. It would seem to be a term applied loosely and Elliot though homely had a better voice than the other two. And quite frankly Mandissa should've won and we will be hearing from her again. Just like Jennifer Hudson (idol a few years back) who did an Actor's Equity show of "Hair"and was phenomenal and will be on screen this winter in the role of Effie in "Dreamgirls." Clay Aiken. Though not the winner, Yuck! Carrie Underwood. Boring. Pretty but BORING. Bo Bice. Ick! Think about it.
Randtol | 2011-05-09 21:51

What happened to Elliott, or did you decide to spoil it for your British readers? I come here for hot guys, not to have my TV programmes spoiled.
hat12 | 2011-05-09 21:51

I said it on, I'll say it here. Elliot got robbed. He had the best voice of all the contestants, he let his confidence kill him in the competition.

Kat has a good voice, but she needs to stop turning everything into a sappy ballad. "Who Wants to Live Forever" (from the Queen theme) and "I Have Nothing" are *not* sappy love ballads. The first is about how can someone go on living when everyone around them is dying, and the second is about how can someone live with their love walking out the door. Neither merits a perky little smile like she did. I really don't think she understands the songs she is singing.

Taylor? He's a dork. Period. I watch him and only think of a bad karaoke performance by a drunken frat boy. Heis not entertaining, and looks aside, he'll fall into the same category as Clay Aiken, Tamayra gray, Jasmine Trias, Justin Guarini and all the other "also rans" from American Idol history. He's a marketing nightmare with a limited shelf life.

It's a shame that the best singers, Mandisa, Chris, Elliot, and Paris, are gone. I really have no incentive to watch the finals. I don't like either of the finalists. This was a good season, but for me it's over. The best won't win, and hopefully the better singers will find careers.
Dave | 2011-05-09 21:51

The beauty of the voting system - one person one vote or many votes, is that it allows you to feel as though you have done your work, even though in the end, it is the major influence that will decide, regardless whether that majority is right or wrong. (think about Bush). You were given a chance even but whether your choice it was that is another thing altogethe.. Not the most perfect system, but better than top-down decisions made for you.. Taylor is a novelty act. Katherine is the typical big-lung'ed diva. That much goes to show what the majority likes - something easy and nothing tough on the brain. The taste of the mass.. Poor Elliot, he is sophisticated in his taste for music, he could have chose a better song.
B.C. (we get live satellite direct telecast here) | 2011-05-09 21:51

Slap! - Mike Vogel
Today's Slap comes courtesy of Neil, who wrote to recommend actor Mike Vogel. About Mike, I have to say this: I thought, when I saw the trailer for Supercross I'd want to see it because of Steve Howey. But not after getting to check out this hottie - I love the scruff he's got going on... He's also, apparently, in the current release of Poseidon, which I guess I'm gonna have to see.

More Mike Vogel

Thanks once again to Dreamcaps and Dewey for the caps!

Wow...I like...
Mike in SD | 2011-05-09 21:51

Wow - I'm so glad to see that Mike's been slapped! He is absolutely delicious - expecially in "Wuthering Heights" and "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre" (both made in 2003 when he was sporting that scraggly, long-haired ragamuffin look that I so love).

Danny | 2011-05-09 21:51

Oh yes! My vote for slap of the month.
terry | 2011-05-09 21:51

uhhh yum!
Brandon Humphries | 2011-05-09 21:51

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And now your weather forecast...
... courtesy of Pat Robertson.

He needs god to tell him that storms are going to hit the U.S. this year??

I love the part "if I heard the Lord right"...Is it that Pat has a hearing problem or does the Lord mumble, or maybe have a lisp?
muffy | 2011-05-09 21:51

Sorry Pat, that wasn't God... that was the Learning Channel. Remember, they did a piece a few weeks ago on NW US Tsunami possibilities... C'mon, ya know ya saw it... ;)
Sebastian | 2011-05-09 21:51

Mmmmmm. Porn.

The Treo 700p

More morons...
Regarding last month's Slap of cutie Matt Lanter some nitwit wrote this today:
It amazes me how all you homo''s think that this class act is gay. Pick on an actual fag.
And then, thinking they hadn't proven themselves stupid enough, they came back with this (I assume it's the same person - they were too chicken to give even a name either time):
Yes he is cute. But he is engaged and not a homo. I thought you weirdos knew the differance?
Once again, to all you silly breeders out there who can't tell this site is for fun and enjoy looking at hot guys like the rest of us - straight and gay alike - I am certainly not opining here that anyone I post about is gay, unless I say otherwise explicitly. In fact, I'm quite certain that the vast majority of the guys I post are not gay. I, and most of the rest of us here, just enjoy looking at them.

But by all means, continue to post silly comments like this - I really do enjoy reading them.

Hmm... some people. *shakes head*
anonymous | 2011-05-09 21:51

Um..why would a straight person be on this site? Not that they can't look, but if you don't see tits or ads for Maxim or beer or straight things, then..... Amazing how I always see "comments" from straights on different sites--but of course one begins to wonder what the f they are doing visiting in the first place. The person who said ML was a "class act" must have been one of those boiz who was on Manhunt and had an unrequited luv for Matt. Yeesh. Carry on.
:) | 2011-05-09 21:51

God strike me down for suggesting this, but has anyone thought that maybe our dear Matt is the one sending the messages? I mean, really. There seems to be an awful lot of interest in him not to suspect. Just sayin'.
Hector | 2011-05-09 21:51

You know, the person really could someone from his PR agency who manages his press and with - or without - Matt Lanter's knowledge could be sending such pronouncements to keep his client as press 'clean' as possible - seriously, there are people who's job it is to do a sort of 'google' search 1/day, 1/week, etc. on their clients to see what press they are getting....just a thought....Dude, be glad someone's paying attention, cause I ain't never heard of Matt Lanter before this
Franzel | 2011-05-09 21:51

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Kat & Taylor it is
At least that's my prediction. I thought Elliott was the clear loser last night.

Taylor continues to annoy me with his flailing around (can he not stand up straight??), but I thought his vocals sounded great last night, especially on "You Are So Beautiful". I was especially thankful that the song forced him into a (relatively) stable performance.

And Katherine sounded spectacular on "Somewhere over the Rainbow", even if she does continue to over-sing. I think that's amounts to flinching in the same way that Taylor's pogo-stick-act is. It's really too bad, because her voice is amazing. I do hope she can get that under control.

And I was quite surprised that Clive Davis did, frankly, such a crappy job of picking songs for the contestants. I don't think any of his choices were any good - the judges were much closer to the mark.

So the finals looks like it's going to be Kat & Taylor, although all three are closer than ever on DialIdol. In fact, this is the first time that Taylor hasn't been alone in the #1 spot.

And then there were two!
I passed the biggest pain-in-the-ass inspection on construction project #2 today - Denver Wastewater. You have never seen so many fucking rules about two little pipes! I guess it's the nature of bureaucracy that rules are invented so they can keep their jobs.

So anyway, after a bunch of pipe sawing, priming and gluing, we're good to go. Now if the other inspector will come back from searching the landfill for bodies (seriously), I can get this house wrapped up.

So - two inspections left. Say a prayer. Or light some incense. I need all the help I can get.

DaVinci starts Friday
Some hated it, Steph and Alek loved it.

But I don't care - nothing could keep me from seeing it. I can't fucking wait. And if you haven't read the book, go get it. Right now. And start reading. Fast.

Slap! - Peter Berg
Brad (you remember Brad - he was the one who was on his knees begging for me to Slap Mike Rowe) wrote recently to suggest today's Slap and I was really surprised that I hadn't included him before. Peter Berg was in one of my favorite movies of all time, Aspen Extreme. It's really an awful movie, but when you have lines like:
We can't go to Vail, it looks like the guy who designed Wendy's went nuts there
how can you go wrong? He was also on Chicago Hope for several years as Dr. Billy Kronk. Anyway, it appears that Peter has, for the most part, given up acting and moved to directing and producing. But I need some help here - while he was acting, specifically in Aspen Extreme and perhaps others, he did some full frontal shots. Anyone have them? I can't seem to track them down.

More Peter Berg

he looks like kevin costner with the permian hat on ...
dave | 2011-05-09 21:51

Just sit the fuck down, shut the fuck up, and listen!
The RIAA is now suing XM Radio for copyright violation for its TiVo-like XM radio receivers.

The arrogance of the music industry is truly breathtaking. They are completely ignoring laws passed in 1992 to which they said:

the AHRA "will eliminate the legal uncertainty about home audio taping that has clouded the marketplace," and "will allow consumer electronics manufacturers to introduce new audio technology into the market without fear of infringement lawsuits."
The record companies have decided that any recording of any broadcast is now distribution - that means that they want royalties as if you were selling CDs. So the 30 minute buffer that the receiver creates is actually the equivalent of a CD.

The worst invention ever...
Right now, the thing at the top of my list is Webex conferencing. Holy crap, I just spent 2.5 hours on a conference call, staring at a Webex screen, trying to tell people how to use a web site.

Can't I just have a colonoscopy with no anesthesia instead?

Thank god my headset battery didn't wear out this time. The only thing worse than a conference call is a conference call without a headset; at least with a headset it's easy to surf when you're get bored.

Slap! - Andy Samberg
Today's Slap goes out to SNL's tasty morsel, Andy Samberg. There's just something so adorkably delicious about him I can't stand it! If you missed SNL this past weekend, be sure to check out The Malcontent's summary and video clips. The Al Gore skit was fantastic, and Andy looked so fucking hot in his MySpace skit.

More Andy Samberg

Update: D'oh! In my haste to get up and greet an inspector, and lick his boots lest I fail my electrical inspection for a third time, I forgot to mention that most of the pics of Andy came from Dreamcaps, where you can find at least some context on what the heck is going on...

Can someone provide context for the nude pics? What was this about? What was the skit?
anonymous | 2011-05-09 21:51

I LOVE ANDY SAMBERG! Excellent slap!
X | 2011-05-09 21:51

I don't know what CRACK some of the others are on - you must have borrowed some from Whitney Houston - because Andy is adorable.

I live near a Top 10 university, and believe me, this is what hot, cute, toned college boys look like these days...the accidental bedhead, lean lanky build...and I say, yum!
Spike | 2011-05-09 21:51

Oy is he cute!
myackie | 2011-05-09 21:51

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Slap! - Ben Affleck
Joey wrote a little while back with a very long list of very fine Slap candidates. I'll be mixing them in with others of your suggestions, but I thought it was time to start getting some of these guys out - since most of them are hotties that I have simply overlooked. Today's Slap being a case in point.

I used to think Ben Affleck was the deal. But then he made Jersey Girl and Bounce and Gigli and Armageddon and... Well, you get the idea. (Stolen shamelessly, BTW, from last week's Will & Grace.)

So anyway, the guy makes bad movies - so does Kevin Costner - they're both still hot.

More Ben Affleck

Do you hear that? Sounds of crickets chirping. OK, maybe Ben was cute when he was younger, but he does nothing for me now. I know where you're coming from, though. I saw M:I:III on Thursday, just looking for some escape. I'm not a fan of Tom Cruise personally, but he was pretty hot up on the big screen.
Eric W | 2011-05-09 21:51

Do you hear that? Sounds of crickets chirping. OK, maybe Ben was cute when he was younger, but he does nothing for me now. I know where you're coming from, though. I saw M:I:III on Thursday, just looking for some escape. I'm not a fan of Tom Cruise personally, but he was pretty hot up on the big screen.
Eric W | 2011-05-09 21:51

Ben never ever looked better than he did in Dare Devil. He was toned and smokin' hot. Tight leather super-hero costumes tend to do that though.
John in T.O. | 2011-05-09 21:51

I loved the South Park episode with him and JLo. I didn't realize until I saw that that he DOES have an abnormally long head.
myackie | 2011-05-09 21:51

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I love bureaucracy...
Hurry up and wait is my theme for the day. You see, construction project #2 is nearly finished - all we have left is a couple of inspections. So I have to sit around the house today waiting for the inspectors.

We failed one inspection on Friday because I wasn't here with a ladder. Good god. So today, until they're all done, I'm here. Waiting. With bells on.

Coloradans, brace yourselves!
I just saw my first ad promoting domestic partnership laws in Colorado. In what promises to be a bruising battle for all sides, there are several initiatives that are working their way to the ballot this fall.

There's a decent chance that conflicting proposals (there are four at last count...) will be on the ballot together. In addition to two conflicting amendments about domestic partnerships, there will apparently be one amendment asking voters to define marriage as between a man and a woman. Interestingly, Focus on the Family head James Dobson (if you don't know who he is, use Google - I won't link to them...) has come out in support of domestic partnerships, saying that they're a reasonable alternative to marriage.

And I wouldn't be terribly surprised if two proposals that essentially cancel each other out both pass. And there are 6 months to go before Election Day; it's going to be a long summer.

I've seen the ads too.
I'm glad they are getting out in front of this early and defining the issue before th nuts in Colorado Springs get a chance to do it for them.
rattylotus | 2011-05-09 21:51

I finally got around to watching the trailer for X-Men: The Last Stand. I can't recommend it enough - visit The Malcontent for the trailer and appropriately gushy comments about the hotness we can all look forward to on 26 May. In the mean time look for an X-Slap or two...

New blog
Steven asked me to let you know about his blog, and because he's cute and sent me a pic (and I'm shameless):

his site is wannabeleader.

The least he could do is post a few more pics of his cuteness.
Eric W | 2011-05-09 21:51

I love that Gene Simmons tounge.
David | 2011-05-09 21:51

The new voter bloc
Starbucks Republicans.

(via Paul)

"polls show they have become increasingly disenchanted with President Bush and Republicans"

How can anyone paying even the barest minimum of attention NOT be "disencahanted"?
Jenna's Bush | 2011-05-09 21:51

Slap! - Steve Bacic
When I posted Daniel Goddard yesterday, I got a couple of suggestions that I Slap the hottie you can see in some of those shots with him. Honestly, I'd been so focused on Daniel that I kinda missed that guy - weird. I guess he might be a bit bulkier than I normally go for.

Anyway, hat12 and Phantom asked that I Slap him - and upon closer inspection (would that it had been closer still...), he's definitely Slap-worthy! Who is he? Steve Bacic. He's been in quite the collection of sci-fi stuff, including X2, Stargate SG-1, Andromeda and the upcoming series Blade, set to appear (as far as I can tell) on Spike TV this fall. Maybe.

More Steve Bacic

Another slap-worthy guy in the Daniel Goddard pictures is the guy who played his sidekick in the Beastmaster series - Jackson Raine. I hope you can slap him and find some shirtless pics - he's hot!
Michael | 2011-05-09 21:51

Lovely, but better with short hair. And he has a nice dick on him.
hat12 | 2011-05-09 21:51

That is cool that people are able to receive the business loans moreover, that opens up completely new chances.
MontgomeryLUCINDA19 | 2011-05-09 21:51

Slap! - Daniel Goddard
Today's Slap is The BeastMaster Daniel Goddard. And I found some pretty good leg shots! Enjoy!

More Daniel Goddard

Update: FUCK - forgot to put the link to the other photos.

If I had him tied down.....WOW!!!!!
Bludevl | 2011-05-09 21:51

You're focusing on the wrong guy. :) Steve Bacic, the guy standing up, MUCH hotter.
hat12 | 2011-05-09 21:51

I read a customer review of the box set of the episodes for The Beasmaster, and this reviewer said that he knew Goddard from his days at a gym in Australia. He said, Goddard was much fatter then, though muscular, and quite a bully--throwing skinnier guys off machines if he wanted to exercise--very rude and so forth. Alas, the illusion of beauty--Sigh! Naturally one could put this judgement down to jealousy.
tjones | 2011-05-09 21:51

WoW! He is hot. Is that show still on?????
Guardian | 2011-05-09 21:51

I'm still not sure you'll get me out there
Apparently, the Grand Canyon Skywalk project will be very safe.

I'll visit Grand Canyon National Park but you won't catch me going out on that skywalk.
Mike | 2011-05-09 21:51

Dolphins like getting high too
Apparently dolphins are addicted to drugs:

Dolphins have been observed using pufferfish as a sort of toy in the wild. They tease the pufferfish with their teeth, causing the small fish to become alarmed and then inflate. After a while the fish calms down and deflates, thus starting the cycle over again. It is speculated that dolphins may also enjoy the mild numbing effect from small amounts of the pufferfish toxin.
I guess someone should alert the DEA.

Day 2 - 20-Apr - Venice
If this is Thursday, this must be Venice.

More narrative later...

More of Day 2

Enjoying your pics - I am planning a trip to Italy in September. Looking forward to some hot Italian slaps too!
Greg | 2011-05-09 21:51

I love Italy, my boyfriend is Italian and we have been there a couple of times... is a great country to explore!
mxdf | 2011-05-09 21:51

Slap! - Shawn Christian
Xavier wrote recently to suggest a Slap for everyone to enjoy - actor Shawn Christian. I've never heard of him, but as Xavier noted:
...all the time, all I could think of was DILF
So here he is. And I'd say the DILF label is pretty accurate. I mean, he's not Ben Browder, but he's pretty damn hot!

More Shawn Christian

Update: OK, I found a couple tolerable pics of his legs. But sorry, no briefs...

Update 2: Oops. I misspelled his name on the post, but I was, in fact, searching the right spelling when looking for pics.


Sean is certainly HOT......BUT how about more bare leg shots for those of us who are legmen??? There must be more pics of these guys in shorts or swim trunks, or even better, briefs. But I wouldn't turn away at whatever you can offer.
Scout | 2011-05-09 21:51

Perfect body. PERFECT. The musculature, the fur, the stats, Perfect.
bron | 2011-05-09 21:51

he played a gay plumber on Ellen sitcom years back and was on the WB's Summerland with that Aussie actor Ryan K. that you slap a few weeks back.
Edison | 2011-05-09 21:51

Thanks for the Legs Update!
Scout | 2011-05-09 21:51

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How surprisingly appropriate
I was surfing old New Yorker cartoons today and came across this gem:

Where, oh Where... are the men?

Jimmy Falon and mediocre-looking race-car drivers aside... I'm jonesin' for a good ol' slap.
In Need of Eye-Candy | 2011-05-09 21:51

Is it just me, or does anyone else like this commercial? Jimmy Fallon looks so cute!

Very cute indeed !
Bleu | 2011-05-09 21:51

Is that Parker Posie???
myackie | 2011-05-09 21:51

I've had drinks w/ Mr. Fallon a few times in the East Village of NYC - cool guy and infectous if only I had bagged him...?!
Franzel | 2011-05-09 21:51

Awful and embarrassing
anonymous | 2011-05-09 21:51

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There he goes again...
More Bush Administration arrogance. I love the response I heard several times today:

if you haven't done anything wrong, what do you have to worry about?

Remind me why a vote for a Democrat is a slam dunk?
Howard Dean, just like so many other prominent Democrats out there, throws gay people overboard.

The Republicans actively demonize us and the Democrats run away from us in fear. What's left for us? Seriously, what's left because I don't know.
Sam | 2011-05-09 21:51

What the hell are we supposed to do? Ain't no way in hell we can start our own party, Repubs would rather set themselves on fire (not a bad idea) than include gays, Dems (as usual) are lukewarm with us. Again it's the lesser of two evils...

Go Green...I guess?
Craig | 2011-05-09 21:51

I wonder if it plays Doom...
The new 100,000,000 pixel virtual reality room at Iowa State.

Day 1 - 19-Apr - Venice
OK, I'm finally gonna post our pictures of Italy. I'll try to post one day of the trip every day, but no promises. I'm still trying to get my pictures organized... So, anyway...


We left Denver on 18-Apr; our flight was scheduled for approximately 6pm. And how nice is it that we have non-stop service from Denver to Frankfurt? I know lots of you East Coast big-city folk have non-stop flights, but it's fairly surprising (at least to me) for Denver.

Anyway, our flight from Denver was delayed, and as we consulted with Lufthansa about the situation, it became clear that we'd miss our connection to Pisa and thus miss our train from Pisa to Venice. We decided to punt until we hit the ground in Germany. So after "Lost Ticket Gate" (another story), we boarded and were on our way.

Hitting the ground in Frankfurt, Lufthansa told us that we'd been scheduled onto the later flight to Pisa. So since our final destination was Venice, we figured we might as well ask if they could send us directly there - I couldn't believe how accomodating they were. It was no problem, and they were even able to route our bags there too. I don't think I've ever been on a U.S. airline when it was so helpful.

Upon arrival in Venice - near dusk - we rounded up a water taxi (yikes! - those are expensive) and headed to our hotel. Our cab driver got confused about our hotel and gave us some hard-to-follow directions, but after some wandering around we chased it down. (At first we were disappointed at not having a view of the water, but our no-view room turned out to be better - we didn't have any noise in the morning. No boats. No people. No carts. Nothing. It was fantastic.)

I should clarify about the hotel: We were booked into a hotel called the Palazzo Selvadego. We didn't know - and neither did our cab driver - that it's actually part of the Hotel Monaco & Grand Canal. So in reality, our cab driver could have dropped us off right at the hotel - with steps from the canal - but instead he dropped us off on a side street and it took us about 30 minutes to figure out where we were going.
So after settling into our room, we headed out for dinner. We wandered a few streets, trying to find something that "spoke to us". We ended up at La Caravella. I've seen online reviews rating the food only as "OK", but I really enjoyed it all - the food, the atmosphere, everything. Maybe I was just exhausted. So after dinner, we grabbed our first (of many) scoops of gelato, headed back to our hotel and collapsed.


More of Day 1

Oh no!!
I can't believe he's gone...

Well, as we watched Idol last night, one of the women said she had voted for Kathryn 10 times. Even the possibility of an all male final 3 trumps talent everytime. I am sort of glad that Idol ratings are down.
Tom in Dallas | 2011-05-09 21:51

Ratings aren't down, and they have won every night. Some nights they have doubled up the other networks. Sorry Chris went, but I am glad it wasn't kat
guest | 2011-05-09 21:51

I was really surprised that Chris was the one that left Wednesday night, but I like Kat, too. I think it will be Kat and either Elliott or Taylor in the finals.
Jimmy | 2011-05-09 21:51

Slap! - Carl Edwards
I had two requests for today's Slap - from Jack and Arlowho. I have to say that he's not my favorite race car driver, but I gotta admit that Carl Edwards is pretty fucking hot. And I have to save that I really like this trend of race car drivers being seen as sex symbols - I know there have to be some more hotties out there on the track.

More Carl Edwards

Yes hot, but hotter if he had a feed bag of oats around his neck. Come on!
anonymous | 2011-05-09 21:51

Anonymous obviously took his bitchy pills with breakfast today.... He's cute, in a Ron Howard when-he-still-had-hair kinda way; actually better than that, with dimples and blue eyes. He moves from cute to hot when he peels off the clothes. :-) Which is notable when the vast majority of guys look better with their bodies covered up!
gm | 2011-05-09 21:51

terry | 2011-05-09 21:51

Damn, y'all are some demanding bitches sometimes.

I like this guy. He looks a whole lot like most guys here in the Midwest, and he's hot.
Spike | 2011-05-09 21:51

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Via Leonard comes this depressing news about American Idol contestant Ace Young.

What's depressing? Don't you know morally corrupt it is to participate in the vile acts of pornography?
W. | 2011-05-09 21:51

What a gorgeous day!
Today I'm reminded of why I like fall so much. No, I haven't moved to Australia. It's just a gorgeous, clear, cold morning here in Denver - really reminiscent of fall. And it just reinforces that fall is by far my favorite season.

American Idol
I've gotten a number of requests - including from my husband - that I bring back my American Idol notes, so here we go:

Taylor The more I watch Taylor, the more I think that all of his jumping and hopping isn't commitment - it's a flinch. It's helping him avoid making the song personal. And while we've obviously come to expect Taylor to look like an out of control super ball, so I don't think it hurts him, the first performance ("Jailhouse Rock") was only OK to me.

The second performance ("In the Ghetto" - one of my absolute favorites from Elvis) had much more potential, but once again he flinched. Getting up and walking around during that kind of song is a flinch. As Tommy Mottola said - the song needs to be about [the singer's face]. Does anyone remember Fantasia's performance of Summertime? She stayed seated the whole time - fully involved in her performance. Regardless, it was much better than his first - more than virtually any other performance from Taylor during the whole season you could actually focus on the music and song.

Chris I thought Chris' first number ("Suspicious Minds") was good - but like Simon I could have done without the sunglasses. Chris usually gives a fairly good performance, nothing outstanding and Suspicious Minds fit that exactly.

His second shot ("A Little Less Conversation") was another from his template. He never feels like he's flinching to me, but he never really lights the place up either. He just gives good solid performances. And that's why he's gotten this far. And geez - could he have looked any better in that shirt???? Wow.

Elliott While I'm the first to agree that Elliott is a very skilled singer - he can accomplish the technical aspects of the performance better than all of the others - I have never seen Elliott give a "real" performance and tonight was no different. His first performance ("I Can Dream") was probably the most authentic I've seen from him, and possibly the best of the night; it still felt weak to me.

Elliott's second number ("Trouble") surprised me - he described it as "having a lot of heart-felt soul". But I just don't think that Elliott is built to do a number like that - he's too vanilla. I guess he did OK. Was it his best performance ever? Perhaps - it was certainly more interesting than most of his. Oh, and could Ryan have been any more obnoxious with his "dollar" comment. Good grief.

Katharine Her first performance, of "Hound Dog", was dreadful. Enough said.

Her second try ("Can't Help Falling in Love") had such potential - it started beautifully. But as all of us watching noted, it could have been stunning a cappella. Instead the arrangement really ramped up the orchestra and drowned the performance and her emotion. As Tommy Mottola noted, "it's really important that you emote, right from the top". She did - right from the top. And then the arrangement messed it up - I wonder who's responsible for that?

As for me, I'd probably have to send Katharine home. I love her voice, but I just don't think she belongs in the top three. Regardless, let's check and see how it looks:

[SPOILER]It looks like, according to DI, that Chris & Katharine are more or less equally likely to get the boot. Katharine has a slight edge, but well within the margin of error.[/SPOILER]

And while we're at it, The Malcontent takes a look at Chris' shirt last night's show too. Apparently he doesn't really care for Taylor either.

Slap! - Keith Anderson
Sebastien wrote some time back to recommend "the best looking (country star) of all", Keith Anderson. Well, I don't know much about country stars, but Keith is definitely hot. Now if I could just find shirtless pics of him - I only found two shirtless pics during my search: one of Keith Anderson the hockey player (who may be the subject of an upcoming Slap) and one of Keith Richards. Now THAT was scary.

So if you know where I can find some hot skin, send it along! Or just grab the pics and send them...

More Keith Anderson

If you are willing to buy a house, you would have to receive the mortgage loans. Moreover, my sister commonly uses a secured loan, which seems to be the most firm.
Karin33Cummings | 2011-05-09 21:51

you'll probably hate him shirtless...he's nice and kind of man.
JT, formerly bottomguy | 2011-05-09 21:51

Blue eyes and HUGE arms. Perfect. Hope you find some shirtless pics...
anonymous | 2011-05-09 21:51

I wish he would take that damn hate off as well as his shirt...He's one hot man!!!
Paul B. | 2011-05-09 21:51

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Sorry, no mulligans on this course
Apparently Zacarias Moussaoui has changed his mind. I guess he doesn't like the idea of rotting away here in Colorado for the rest of his life. Awwww. That breaks me up.

Well, welcome to Colorado, Zac! Too bad you won't get to enjoy it!!

Personally, I think this is a much better punishment for someone like Moussaoui - he's certainly convinced that if he's executed he's on his way to heaven and 72 virgins. Why make it fun for him?

And why should the poor virgins have to suffer????
fareva | 2011-05-09 21:51

And why should we let him be a martyr and stir up more conflict with his execution?
muffy | 2011-05-09 21:51

I live here in Indian Country, at our lake home we were only 29 miles from the location of Mr. Zacarias's arrest and detention. Boy were we scared, just think he could have broken in my home office and rehearsed his dastardly goal of a Kamakazi plunge into the White House on Micrsoft Flight Simulator.

Just consider the unmitigated gall he demonstrated by not confessing to 9/11 several weeks before it occured, assuming he had any knowledge of it in any event.

I am sure the FBI would have charged into the breach by all of them dressing up in pink tu-tu's and performing Swan Lake on the roof of the White House to distract him on his death plunge.

Get Real people! he was as much a terroist as a Mall Cop wannbe is a valued member of the SEAL's or one of the other Special Forces.
Robert McGillen | 2011-05-09 21:51

Hello, CBS!!
Matt, writing the "Daily DudeTube" over at Fleshbot has some lessons from Big Brother - Australia that CBS execs could apply here. Namely, full frontal showers.

I'd watch.

People in all countries take the loans from different banks, because this is simple.
GrayBernice22 | 2011-05-09 21:51

Slap! - Brian Bloom
And now for something slightly furrier. David wrote to suggest today's Slap, actor Brian Bloom. I'm glad to post him, but I'm not sure Brian does much for me - there's just something a little too "80's" about him. Hmmm... What do you think?

More Brian Bloom

I've been a fan of his since watching him as a teen in his soap opera days. Guess that was in the 80s, when we were both young. Now I'm gonna need to google those pics.
Eric W | 2011-05-09 21:51

Having visited this site daily for only the past month, and it is addictive, I would submit tha Brian Bloom is the hottest you've slapped yet!...Beautiful eyes on him, and being a legman,I find his gorgeous hairy legs a major turn on!....By the way, I notice most of the pics on this site don't really show much of these guys' legs. More shots of their quads and calves would be a BIG plus!
Scout | 2011-05-09 21:51

Oh, Dusty from "As the World Turns." Lily's first love. And the true Stenbeck heir. Sigh...
Hector | 2011-05-09 21:51

This is one I always wanted to see you SLAP. Now, if someday you will slap Adrian Pasdar, I will be eternally grateful
anonymous | 2011-05-09 21:51

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Slapdate! - Rob Hoffman
You may remember Rob Hoffman from last November:

Well Hector is quite a fan of Rob and discovered a fantastic spoof video on Rob's site. Check it out!

He looks absolutely beautiful in that video, i was just sat there dribbling...damn his straight ass....
Mule | 2011-05-09 21:51

That was so great! I loved it, man he's hot. What a pretty white ass he's got! I can't wait to see the rest. keep tme posted!
dae | 2011-05-09 21:51

I watched his video's and laughed my guts out. Check them out, he's not only pretty, he's smart.
Steve | 2011-05-09 21:51

Slap! - Cam Gigandet
Chuck wrote to suggest someone, insisting that "you'd have your Slap of the Month and a contender for the Year". Skeptical as always, but optimistic since he's on The O.C., I looked up the proposed victim, Cam Gigandet. Wow. Cam has quite the body and I love the "bad boy" thing he's got going on in his O.C. pics. Some of his pics really look nice and clean cut, too. YUM!

More Cam Gigandet

Yes yes yes yes yes. Erm. Yes. And more yes.
hat12 | 2011-05-09 21:51

Eric, it's funny that we both like the nerdy one in the show yet then like the real bad boy!
hat12 | 2011-05-09 21:51

Hat, what can you do? Benjamin McKenzie (Ryan) just doesn't do much for me, but this guy? Rowwrr. There's also another bad boy Cam's character hangs out with long black hair. Also way hot. In Adam Brody's case, it's his charisma, his wit, and he's just adorable.

Why couldn't TV shows aimed at teens when I was that age be cast with such eye candy? That's now my dream job -- casting TV and movies for teens. "I'm not sure who is right for this role, let's call Channing Tatum and Brandon Routh in and have them do screen tests for the role of the shirtless drifter." Ahh, the opportunity to meet many of these slap! subjects in person. Sigh.
Eric W | 2011-05-09 21:51

I like your thinking.
hat12 | 2011-05-09 21:51

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Slap! - Jake McDorman
A while back some anonymous contributor wrote to suggest that I wake up and Slap today's victim, actor Jake McDorman. I took a quick look at the time, just to see what was being requested since I'd never heard of Jake. So what a surprise when I looked this morning and found out that he's only 19! I would have sworn on my quick look at pics that he was at least 24 or so. Of course, age hasn't really been a problem in the past, huh?

Jake was recently in one of my favorite shows, House, M.D.. I don't remember that episode - hopefully I can catch it in a rerun.

More Jake McDorman

This is sad! I think slaps should at least meet the drinking age requirement.
terry | 2011-05-09 21:51

The legal drinking age in Canada is 18 !!!
Legal age for drinking his love juice is called CONCENT 18...
Mike | 2011-05-09 21:51

Legal for sex for 3 years, legal to drink for 1 year, legal to drive for 2. So he can drive me to a hotel, where we'll drink and have fun!
hat12 | 2011-05-09 21:51

Told you he was a HOTTIE.. he started on the fox show the Quints. Hopefully we will see more of him....
Mike | 2011-05-09 21:51

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Kolby Wood is a moron
A person calling themselves "Kolby Wood", who is too chicken-shit to send along his or her e-mail address, sent along this lovely little missive today:
Subject: Don't worry about it

Listen asshole, It would be a good idea to let your love for Ryan to die. All of you moron ave no idea that you have no chance... HE IS NOT GAY!!!! You have wasted much of your time on a breeder. Let it go
Charming. Apparently Kolby thinks all I do is post shrines to hot men, hoping that they're gay and that I'll get them in bed. Well, OK I guess that is what I do huh?

Um, Kolby, if you're reading this, all we're doing here is admiring attractive men - I don't give a rat's ass if any of them are gay or not. If they are, welcome to the club! If not, it's too bad for them that they're apparently playing on your team - if I weren't gay already, you would be enough to turn me.

But really, on to the more important reason that I posted this. Why don't I get more of these?? Seriously, shouldn't I have some fire-breathing Baptist breathing down my neck by now? I need more hate mail! I want some fire and brimstone, dammit!

Even morons like "Kolby" are fun - this e-mail really did brighten my day. I guess the only thing I wonder is which Ryan is referred to in the e-mail? I suppose it must be Ryan Kwanten since I posted him on Monday. Geez, he really is hot, isn't he??

Maybe Kolby needs a hug and is afraid to open the closet door and cum into the light...
Mike | 2011-05-09 21:51

Maybe Kolby is just a made up name for a freaked out Ryan who doesn't like the idea of getting this kind of attention from a bunch of 'mos! Kolby, get over it.
scotte | 2011-05-09 21:51

I think an appropriate response... or "experiment"... is to SLAP every Ryan you can and see which one generates the most hate mail.
Kevin | 2011-05-09 21:51

I think the nutter might be referring to Ryan Lebar. Kenneth in the (212) got some similar, poorly spelled, e-mails castigating him for daring to imply that the lovely fellow is gay. By the way, the implication was due to Kenneth having a picture of Mr. LeBar on his gay website.
JT, formerly bottomguy | 2011-05-09 21:51

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This message will self-destruct in 30 seconds
If you're considering seeing M:I III, QueerBeacon takes a look at the film's gay content.

Is that some wacky foreign translation, or are they drunk or something? I can't make head nor tail of it.
hat12 | 2011-05-09 21:51

Slap! - Matthew Davis
Since Steve suggested him, and since it's been over a year since I Slapped him last, and since he's really fucking fine, and since he doesn't shave his chest hair, and since we Slapped his co-star in What About Brian yesterday, and since I finally found a pretty good picture of his ass (woohoo!), I decided that Matthew Davis deserved another Slap.

As I said the last time I Slapped him, the only thing I've ever seen him in was Blue Crush, which was fantastic because you know about surfing movies - they're strictly a vehicle to show pretty actors with very little clothing. Is there really anything else they're for?

More Matthew Davis

the last photo isn't him. Don't know who it is but the eyes and ears are different.
anonymous | 2011-05-09 21:51

What, you've never seen "Legally Blonde"? What kind of queer are you?
Stuart | 2011-05-09 21:51

He was also in LEGALLY BLONDE
Bobby | 2011-05-09 21:51

I've loved him since the horror movie, "Below". He's shirtless and very furry and hot in the one good scene of the recent B-movie vampire flick, "BloodRayne".
will | 2011-05-09 21:51

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Maybe I should play rugby
I know that those gay rugby teams get frisky off the field (I've heard stories that would curl your hair...), but on the field? Maybe I really should join a team:

via QueerClick via The Bulge Report.

Where'd you hear these stories?
John | 2011-05-09 21:51

Fantastic news, this is!
Apparently George Lucas - once thought to be a minon of the dark side for tampering with the originals of Star Wars, et al, and "updating" them with groovy special effects and updated characters (Han Solo) - has come to his senses and will be releasing unaltered versions of the original three films on DVD.

What an enormous surprise! When Lucas insisted on tampering with the first three movies he really made some stupid changes - including the buzzy/whizzy/child-friendly/goofy robots. And, the most controversial of all, "cleaning up" Han Solo's character by having him fire his blaster second in the cantina, not first as the original movie showed.

I went so far as to find a video shop that would convert my original set of VHS tapes to DVD. Far from an ideal solution, but while I own every version that's been published, the un-doctored ones are the only ones that really satisfy.

They'll only be available for a limited time, starting on September 12th.

you're a nerd.
skoobs | 2011-05-09 21:51

Live long and prosper! May the force be with you!

Oh hell, I know one of those works for Star Wars.
Wagon | 2011-05-09 21:51

Sometimes I wonder how we came from the same womb.
muffy | 2011-05-09 21:51

I have to agree with QueerBeacon - as much as I hate Tom Cruise (he really is a complete ass), I'm going to have to see Mission Impossible. If I buy a ticket to another movie and then sneak in to MI does that make it OK??

My boyfriend won tickets to a free preview last night so we went and I have to say that it's not bad. Plus, one of Tom's co-stars is not bad eye candy. Although it may have been better with nudity shot.
geromer | 2011-05-09 21:51

Slap! - Barry Watson
Today's Slap comes courtesy of Steve. He wrote to ask that I Slap the three hot guys from What About Brian. Well, Barry Watson is the first. I've Slapped the other two - Matthew Davis and Raoul Bova before, but that doesn't mean they won't show up again! Especially Matthew, who's gone Slap-less since January of 2005!

And I really hope that all of the pics I posted of Barry are really of Barry - he's kinda got a Jared Padalecki thing going on, don't you think? Now if we could just see him handcuffed naked to a table...

More Barry Watson

Thanks very much! Most appreciated. While the show "What About Brian" isn't very good, the eye candy is spectacular. I love how none of the hot guys on the show shave their chests.
Steve | 2011-05-09 21:51

Something has got to be done with his hair! And what's that shower cap he's wearing about?
Scout | 2011-05-09 21:51

He is a handsome devil, but I truly wish he'd get a new haircut. He's had the same stringy do for eons.
anonymous | 2011-05-09 21:51

Mhhh, not my taste, if anything from 7th Heaven was slappable, I pick David Gallagher (Simon) he was hot!
Nicholas | 2011-05-09 21:51

Your politics thought for the day
...the choice between Republicans and Democrats is now similar to having to chose between zits and a fever blister to adorn your face.
- Neal Boortz

This would freak me out

What is it?

Just think - it's basically a red carpet invitation for all of those bugs that are crawling around on your face to shimmy on up and set up shop right on your cornea. Thanks but no. But I do know a good attorney who could help out when the whole thing goes south.
muffy | 2011-05-09 21:51

"Why no, my dear. I wasn't looking at your boobs."
Dave | 2011-05-09 21:51

Slap! - Garrett Hedlund
Today's Slap is little-known actor Garrett Hedlund. I found him in Troy, playing Patroclus (Achilles' nephew), but he's also been in Friday Night Lights and in Four Brothers (whence come the ass shots) with former Slap Mark Wahlberg.

I've listed nearly his entire resume - I'm just hoping that he'll get more roles soon.

More Garrett Hedlund

Ahh him. Very nice. I want to watch Four Brothers for him alone.
hat12 | 2011-05-09 21:51

Do NOT rent Four Brothers. I turned it off 30 minutes in; and even knowing of these ass shots, I am not sorry.
Mel | 2011-05-09 21:51

If that's the bar for "very" homophobic, you'd better avoid ever seeing movies like "Cruising." Or is there a category for "very very?"
anonymous | 2011-05-09 21:51

Actually I enjoyed that movie, certainly more than I expected to.
Clay | 2011-05-09 21:51

Bloom, baby!
No, I'm not talking about Jeremy Bloom, but I'd like to. No, this time I'm talking about I had never used ProFlowers before a couple of weeks ago, but I had of course heard about them on various radio ads. I ordered a couple of different arrangements for various people, including one for us here at home. I couldn't be happier, and neither could the people I sent the flowers too - our arrangement lasted over two weeks and looked great the whole time. I've heard the same thing from others recently.

So my mind is made up, unless the flowers have to be there today, I'm using They don't work for flowers that have to get there immediately, because the flowers are shipped to the recipient, not delivered by hand. So other than that one small exception, my mind is made up: The flowers look better, last longer and are, by and large, cheaper when you get them from ProFlowers.

Update: ProFlowers was kind enough to send along a new link with an offer attached - if you follow the link above to place your order you'll get a free vase. So order now! Yes, now! Your mom is expecting flowers next Sunday, you know, so you better get the order in!

Jeremy Bloom has a cool website :) Maybe I should send him some flowers :)
muffy | 2011-05-09 21:51

Funny, we were just talking about them at work....because everyone had a story about how they fucked something up.

Someone at work today had a birthday, and they had a vase of flowers delivered (with the vase smashed into three pieces.)
Spike | 2011-05-09 21:51

Slap! - Scott Caan
Augusto wrote to ask that I Slap actor Scott Caan, which is, frankly, a slam dunk. Sometimes I get requests that don't particularly turn me on (but at only one Slap available per day, I can't include all of your suggestions, regardless - there are just too many, but I try to get them in), but Scott is one that really lights my fire. I first saw him in Varsity Blues with Dawson's Creek heartthrob James Van Der Beek, where he showed that beautiful ass. He's been in lots of other movies, including all three of the Ocean movies.

More Scott Caan

Update: corsaboi is quite right about the picture on the next page. I wasn't sure so I threw it in, just in case. For some reason, there were quite a few pics out there that were labeled as Scott, but weren't. Hmmm...

Scott may be about the hottest actor around. He's a good writer/director, too. His film with another hottie, Shawn Hatosy is currently playing cable.
Farnham | 2011-05-09 21:51

He has also done a scene where his is nude and you get to see the goods. It was called Speed of Life.
Keaver28 | 2011-05-09 21:51

He did the ass shot for VB, as he thought that if the girls had to do it, then so should at least one of the guys! Nice equal oppurtunist!

Kim | 2011-05-09 21:51

WOW! What a butt.
Jim | 2011-05-09 21:51

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Taking it to the streets!
A protester tells it like it is:

I don't get it. Is he saying only illegals work at Taco Bell!
gad1n10 | 2011-05-09 21:51

great way to say you'd like to stay and work here in America by not working.
jessie | 2011-05-09 21:51

Brian Joubert
Dan was kind enough to forward this video of former Slap and French Olympian Brian Joubert.

His ass leaves me speechless.

sorry hit loading and it does not work
anonymous | 2011-05-09 21:51

WOW! very nice. Skaters always have great "muscles" Great Video ! Thanks !! This guy is HOT.
Bleu | 2011-05-09 21:51

yes, not working for me too
drcullex | 2011-05-09 21:51

I would enjoy being left speechless, but, alas, the video will not load for me either!
anonymous | 2011-05-09 21:51

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Slap of the Month - April!
Sorry for the delay in getting these babes posted, but it always amazes me how much CRAP there is to take care of when you get back from a long vacation. Augh! Sometimes it makes me never want to travel again. Nevertheless, aside for one lapse (d'oh!) and a missed train that caused two lost Slaps, April is one of the hottest months I can remember in a while. I mean there's the twink-a-licious Randy Wayne and Jamie Davis, two of my old favorites Matt Dillon and Jerry O'Connell, and the beautifully furry Ben Browder and Bradley Cooper. And don't forget the exotic looking Sean Brosnan - wow! And fuck, I thought I had decided who I was going to vote for, but after reviewing the candidates I can't make up my mind. I do have a prediction as to who's gonna win, but we'll see.......

Also, I'm trying something new this month - I made the pics of each candidate in this article smaller so that the whole post is more manageable. Good? Bad?

So let's hear it, who was the hottest in April??

Randy Wayne

Rupert Everett
Jamie Davis

Gary Lucy

Jerry O'Connell

Matt Dillon

Justin Chambers

Thomas Jane

Thad Luckinbill
Sean Brosnan

Kenny Chesney
Cillian Murphy
Ben Crowley
Jacques Villeneuve
Ben Browder

Gabriel Aubry

Jamie McMurray

Matt Lanter
Dominic West
Caleb Lane
Bradley Cooper

Corey Sevier

Billy Currington
Ari Gold
Kelly Slater

anonymous | 2011-05-09 21:51

anonymous | 2011-05-09 21:51

anonymous | 2011-05-09 21:51

Slap! - Jonathan Jesensky
A big thanks go out to Brenton over at Aussielicious for turning me on to today's Slap, model Jonathan Jesensky. Jonathan is apparently from Kentucky, and according to Brenton quite a nice fellow. I really like to hear it when the pretty people are nice, I have to admit. Jonathan's site also features some of his rather diverse taste in music, so I highly recommend checking it out.

And if you haven't, you should check out Aussielicious too - and send your pics in to the random nudity challenge. I know I owe him one...

More Jonathan Jesensky

Well fuk me ne day!
Howdy | 2011-05-09 21:51


Well, Jonny, i never forsake you. I can't. I smell the sweet, sweet scent of your soul amd how could i forsake you. I smell the most excellent scent of goodness upon you and it is a scent i enjoy and honor and cherish. That which is treasurable must be treasured. It is my job to do so.
Satan, the Hindmost | 2011-05-09 21:51

Damnable me! Me and my typos! How typos screw up the mood and authenticity when i'm trying to whisper sweet nothings which are really sincere somethings. Oh well, it will teach me to run everything through a spell checker first. I blush with embarrassment.
Satan, the Hindmost | 2011-05-09 21:51

Vic | 2011-05-09 21:51

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Slap! - Ryan Kwanten
Some anonymous fellow (I guess it was a fellow...) wrote to suggest today's Slap, Aussie actor Ryan Kwanten. It's been quite some time (over a year) since I've Slapped Ryan, so I figured he was good for an update. He is just so fucking hot - and he seems to pose nude a fair amount, but those silly photographers keep handing him props he can use to cover his naughty bits. Alas...

More Ryan Kwanten

Hot! A Good Aussie bloke!
There are some of him in calvin klines floating around...
Jerry | 2011-05-09 21:51

A nice choice to start off the week. Adorable and sexy. Now I won't need that second cup of coffee to get me going.
Eric W | 2011-05-09 21:51

Go0d locking man.......
logo design | Web site | 2011-05-10 08:06

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